On top of old Sophie, all covered with sweat,
I've used sixteen rubbers; she hasn't come yet.

Well, fucking's a pleasure, and coming's relief,
But a long winded lover is worse than a thief.

She'll hug you and kiss you, say it won't be long,
But two hours later she's still going strong.

So come all you fellers and listen to me:
Don't place your erection in a long-winded she.

For your root it will wither, your passion will die,
And she'll never believe the real reason why.