Dear Penis

Dear Penis, I don't think I like you anymore.
You used to watch me shave,
Now all you do is stare at the floor.
Oh dear Penis, I don't like you anymore.

It used to be you and me, a paper towel and a dirty magazine.
That's all we needed to get by.
Now it seems things have changed, and I think that you're the one to blame.
Dear Penis, I don't like you anymore

(He sings)

Dear Rodney, I don't think I like you anymore.
'Cause when you get to drinkin',
You put me places I've never been before.
Dear Rodney, I don't like you anymore.

Why can't we just get a grip
On our man-to-hand relationship
And come to terms with truly how we feel?

If we put our heads together,
We'd just stay home forever.
Dear Penis, I think I like you afterall.
Oh and Rodney, while you're shaving, shave my balls.